b' Caokid,surroundedbyChris- dered why. I always see peo-tiansgrowingup,andwentplecryingduringsermons, toChristianschools.Iwasduring praise, or during their submerged in Gods love, andbaptismandwhilesharing I consider myself to be verytheirveryepictestimony.I blessed.really wanted to have that. Asdayswentby,nothing seemed to happen. Going to churchseemedmorelikea routine and responsibility. I looked at church more like a workplace instead of a sacred Though I wholeheartedly be- holyplacewherewehave lieve in Christ, I did not trulyconnection with Jesus Christ. feel his presence until when IAs my responsibilities piled was in high school. For mostupatchurch,Iunderstood ofthetime,Godfeltmoretheimportanceofguiding like an entity that I randomlyyoungertweensintoChrist pray to, that I thank for foodandIknowGodhadgiven insteadofalovingfatherm e th e p ower to c han ge figureasportrayedinthelives, but I never knew how bible. I yearned for that con- towieldthepower,touse nection, and I prayed for memytonguetopraiseGods to feel something, anything.name. Time went by, I start-I want to be deeply toucheded to lose the will to pray. I by the holy spirit, but noth- stoppedopeningthebible; ing seemed to spark that, andfor most days in a week, I al-me as a young teenager won- most forgot the fact that I am 54'